Mother DOES NOT KNOW Best
by fitzherbertfangirl
Summary: Eugene walks in on reprise of Mother Knows Best...what will happen? Hinted Rapunzel x Eugene! My first Tangled fic! CHAPTER TWO...first Eugene saves the day...now it's Maximus' turn! Full summary inside!
1. Chapter 1

**Ooooh! Ooooh! A Tangled fic! One I never intended to write, but…I write about people in stuff I really love, and that includes Tangled…they already have their happily ever after, so what is there to write except fluff…but then I had this inspiration! What if Eugene walked in on the Reprise of 'Mother Knows Best'? Oh noes! The title stinks, but I couldn't think of anything better…I don't own Tangled or its characters, but the idea was all mine! Eugene's POV, beware of plenty of Eugene x Rapunzel! XD**

_Mother *Does NOT Know* Best_

_By Obsessive Shipper98_

"Was he a thief, too?" Rapunzel asked gently.

Wow, never thought about that one. Why was I a thief? It seemed silly now, naïve and pointless. I could have just gotten a job. But that would be just _boring. _And anyway, If I hadn't been running from those guards, I wouldn't have found Rapunzel, so, in a way, it was good. Wait…why does it matter if I never met Rapunzel?

"No." I said, almost surprised. "Actually, he had enough money to do whatever he wanted. He could go anywhere he wanted to go. And for a kid with nothing…just seemed like the better option." I recalled all those days, daydreaming about what it would be like to live like Flynnigan Rider, not the parentless kid I was.

Rapunzel just smiled at me gently. She understood? Must have. No one has really ever just listened. I mean, why should they care, anyway? But Rapunzel...did. She understood. She _had_ sort of been in the same situation, just different context. She had spent her childhood dreaming of something. For her, it was lanterns, for me, Flynn Rider. I hope that's not the only reason. I want Maybe she's more than just the girl I'm taking to the lights. I found myself smiling back at her. Wait, wait, WHOA, Eugene, what are you doing? You don't believe in love!

"Um, um, I better…I better get some more firewood…" I said nervously and planned to make a quick departure. I admit it, okay? I got scared, and was halfway to the 'firewood' destination when I hear her say sweetly,

"Hey, for what it's worth, I like Eugene Fitzherbert a lot more than Flynn Rider."

I almost said, "Really?" but I stopped myself. Nobody had ever really liked my real name…it was always 'too this' or 'too that'. Long, mostly, I guess. And I had wanted to be someone else. Eugene Fitzherbert had no family, or friends, no worldly or otherwise pleasures, no nothing, for that matter. He had spent his growing up wishing he _wasn't_ Eugene Fitzherbert. Flynn Rider was handsome thief, attractive, dashing, daring, mysterious not bad with the ladies either…he was everything I wanted to be. He was the daydream I had been chasing all those years. But Eugene Fitzherbert had one thing Flynn Rider didn't: He had Rapunzel. I couldn't help but smile as I said,

"Well, then, you would be the first."

I found some firewood pretty easily, we didn't need much anyway, and this little task was beginning to feel dull, and I'd rather be back with Rapunzel...geez, Eugene, you sound infatuated! I shrugged off my conscience's suggestion. Okay, maybe she was more than a burden in the way of my cheesy island dream, but I don't _like_ her. Wait-WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN AFTER THE LIGHTS? Is she really going back? Does she want to spend her life sheltered? My sudden panic of parting with Rapunzel startles me. Who am I, anymore? Less than 24 hours ago I was definitely someone else entirely.

_Dear, this whole romance that you've invented,_

_Just proves, you're too naïve to be here_

Who the crap is that? Doesn't sound like Rapunzel. In fact, unless she hit me extra hand with that frying pan weapon of hers, it's not Rapunzel. I see a middle aged woman circling Rapunzel like a taunting animal. Who's this lady?

_Why would he like you, come on now, really,_

_Look at you! You think that he's impressed? _

_Don't be a dummy,_

_Come with Mummy, _

_Motherrrr-_

So _this_ is the overprotective mother. Wait-it wouldn't be too terribly unlike the loyal and timid Rapunzel to go with her. NO! She can't do that! I have this really good plan for the lights I was planning to execute like a professional. She just had to come. She just had to see those lanterns…

I was fixing to burst from the shadows when Rapunzel's shockingly firm voice stops me.

"**No."**

She's rebelling…my panic softens. Why were you panicked in the first place, Eugene? I am seriously starting to confuse myself.

_No? __**Oh**__._

_I see how it is!_

_Rapunzel knows best, Rapunzel's so mature now, _

_Such a clever grown-up miss_

I almost blurt out "Heck yeah!" but stop myself. Just where is this going?

_Rapunzel knows best, fine if you're so sure now, go ahead then give his THIS!_

_THIS is why he's here, don't let him deceive you!_

_Give it to him, watch, you'll see_

That demented-looking woman has my satchel! Some people…I was about to step in and snatch it from her, (it's one of my specialties) when I realize, 'She's talking about…ME.' I stopped to listen.

_Trust me, my dear, _

_That's how fast he'll leave you_

WELL, ex-cuse me, I most certainly WOULD NOT do that! Some people just mess with that blondie's head…huh? A dark part of me whispers, "What would you do, Eugene? Really? Are you not going to take your crown and leave after your brilliant light plan?" I swallow hard. That is exactly what has been scaring me since she started to be more than a burden. I might have a thrilling plan for the lanterns, but I had no plan for the future, which a feeling I kept shaking off told me she would have a part in. It doesn't matter. What matters now is that manipulating, infuriating, evil, faux-young woman doesn't poison Rapunzel's image of me.

_So if such a dreamboat,_

_Go and put him TO THE TE-_

"Shut up, old hag."

Rapunzel turns to face me, leaning against a tree, contemplating a piece of kindling and acting a lot more composed then I was feeling.

"Eugene!" She cries, and runs over to me. "I'm so sorry…"

"Don't be. You had your turn to be sorry in the flooding cave. And, that, I might add, wasn't even really your fault. It's your mother's turn be sorry. And she can shut up and leave, 'cause, Madam, like it or not, I'm taking Rapunzel to see those lanterns." I stood up to full height, in shock of what I had just said. It wasn't supposed to be so…dramatic.

"Eugene…" Rapunzel breathed, looking at me gratefully with those big emerald eyes of hers.

Her mother looked a bit shocked, to say the least. (YES! Eugene: one, Mummy: zero!)

She quickly shook off the dumb look and went up to Rapunzel. Out of instinct, I put my arms around her. It was obvious she wasn't the great mother Rapunzel thought she was. I might have never known my mom, but I knew enough to know this witchy woman wasn't a good one. I faced her with the most solid face I could conjure up. I considered my all-amazing Smolder, but thought better of it. Maybe my Smolder not working runs in the family. We faced her together, Rapunzel leaning back against me, genuinely scared, as I could feel by her shaking. She pranced up to us with a sickening smirk on her face. She said smugly, "If he's lying, don't come crying, dearest. MOTHAAAA **KNOWSSSSS** **BESSST**!"

And with a flash of her cloak she was gone. For a moment all was silent. Rapunzel stayed leaning on me, still shaking; scared.

*Rapunzel's POV*

"_Eugene…he protected me. Oh, Mother, Mother, why must you be so protective? The world is amazing! Ahem, now, Rapunzel, you need to get off Eugene."_

But a part of her wished she could stay like this forever.

*Back to Eugene's POV*

This should have been awkward. Really should've been. But after a long, scared yet cozy silence, Rapunzel said,

"Eugene, 'thank you' doesn't even come close."

I smiled, though she couldn't see me, "No problem, Blondie. If I'm going to do a job, I'm going to do it right, and no satchel-stealing mother's going to stop Eugene Fitzherbert!"

I could tell she was smiling. Then her tone became solemn and she said, "What is going to happen after the lights?"

I frowned. I still hadn't figured that out. "Rapunzel," I said. She looked up at me, her green eyes scared and confused.

"Eugene?"

"I really don't know. But, live your dream, and then you can pick a new one."

A glitter in her eyes told me I might be just that.

**Oh oh I just LOVE this! Okay, maybe it was just fun for me to write, but…I hope y'all loved it about as much as I did. Yes, Eugene's a little OOC, sorry! ^^ **

**EVEN MORE TO COME, **

**Latias**


	2. Chapter 2: Maximus

**Someone just always has to rain on Gothel's parade, don't they? First Eugene…now MAXIMUS! Enjoy! Maximus' POV, implied Eugene x Rapunzel. Some of it is what Max might've been thinking during the 'Kingdom Dance' scene. Don't leave! It's not JUST thoughts, don't worry…some action too. OH, and I borrowed a scene from 'Best Birthday Ever', my previous Tangled fic, 'cause Best Birthday Ever was originally supposed to have Max walk in on them, but it didn't happen…so here's what did! (in my fantasies, not the movie ;D) (not that the movie's not perfect how it is…uhh! You get the point, right?)**

Mother Doesn't Know Best, Maximus Does!

A continuation of 'Mother DOES NOT KNOW Best' by fitzherbertfangirl

April 2011

A peculiar white steed was strutting down the Corona streets. His brown eyes darted from one sight to another, searching, yet watchfully avoiding. A horse of the Palace Guard, trying, and somewhat succeeding not to look like one, as long as nobody noticed the insignia of Corona on his breast plate, and the brass engraving upon it, M A X I M U S.

"You WANT that dog-gone thief in prison, Maximus, here's your chance!" a dark voice in my head kept telling me. And yet, why am I slinking around corners and hiding in shadows, trying not to be seen? I don't know. Canine instinct? I say most everything is canine instinct. But, canine instinct would be telling me to run home to my stable in the palace and have a boring chat with my fat stable friends. Never did I realized how out of shape I was until I began chasing that dastardly bandit. So why am I protecting him?

Because of the look on his face when Rapunzel made us shake hands. A few hours earlier, she had pulled us apart and unlocked the secret to my heart: PET ME LIKE I'M A DOG! We had made a pact, a truce, a treaty not to be such buttheads for a mere twenty-four hours. Just for her birthday. I say to my shame I was still a bit sulky when we shook on it. I say also to my shame that the thief, who's breed is supposed to have no honor or manners whatsoever, offered his hoof before I offered mine. And, to my utter and total embarrassment, I punched him in the stomach when Rapunzel was not looking. He should have been arguing, sulking, resisting, being a pain in rear end. But no. That was _me_, the horse raised with gentlemanly kindness and poise. That's what the thief had. He sighed submissively and, with an unpleasant yet willing face, offered his hand. _That face_. He's doing it for _her_, to please_ her_, to make _her _birthday a little more perfect. I felt as if I had a duty to Rapunzel as well.

That's the next thing! I've been around royalty all my life, the self-centered and the humble, the poised and the wild, the good, the bad, the ugly. All royalty, even if they do not know it, have a royal aura about them. I don't think those sometimes dense humans can sense it, but every person has a very specific feel about them. Whether they're nice, concealing evil, or evil, with a good heart somewhere deep down…envious, self-centered, pompous, humble…or of higher position than your average person. So, needless to say but never bragging, animals have a much better feel for a person than people do. Something in my brilliant mind tells me that that blonde girl is somehow connected to royalty. And, she does look almost exactly like The Queen, even though her hair varies drastically. The Queen's a brunette. ;) I have a duty to royalty. I always have and I always will. It's what I was born to do. And my royalty instinct has never failed my in seven years of life before. I don't think it's about to fail me now. If Rapunzel is a descendant of the royals, I am going to honor her, protect her, fight for her, do whatever I must. Even if that means hiding a thief from the law.

And this thief, supposedly Flynn Rider, isn't even your average thief. HIS NAME AIN'T FLYNN RIDER. His_ name _is Eugene Fitzherbert. Who would have thought? I've caught plenty of thieves over the years, all with catchy names, but never one that rolls of your tongue quite like Flynn Rider. I mean, WHY DID HE HAVE TO RUIN THE PICTURE ESQ-NESS WITH REALITY? I know, I sound like a foal, but…Eugene Fitzherbert? Gosh, I would have changed my name too! But Rapunzel…she says the name like a gentle caress, a stroke between the withers, a loving touch, never physical, but definitely vocally pleasing, even to Eugene, _especially _to Eugene. I personally thought he would tell her to call him Flynn, because I sure would. But, no, not once did he complain. He rather enjoyed it.

And though I loathe to admit it, Flynn never had a completely bad aura about him. My conscience kept telling me he wasn't bad at heart. I'm realizing that now.

Where are that cute little pair, anyway? Mmm…maybe along some backstreets. I start winding through alleys and streets until I spot them. Tucked inside a little indent in the street walls. Talking quietly, she's giggling and he's grinning. He has quite the goofy grin around Rapunzel, but if anyone asks, I didn't say so. He'll eat me for dinner, of that I'm fairly certain. This is there moment, I'm not going to barge in. I backed up a little bit to leave and find Pascal to show him some of the finest Corona attractions, (including our beautiful fountain that has the sweetest water to sip from) when I find myself face to face with a woman in a dark hooded cloak. In an instant I know who this woman is. My mind flies back to the night before.

Hot on the trail of Flynn Rider, I was winding through the forest when I saw some dark shadows of humans, crouched behind a rather thickly overgrown tree. Spying on…HA! Flynn and Rapunzel, conversing quietly. "Super human good looks, I've always had 'em, born with it! But super human _strength?_ That would be fantastic. Can you imagine the possibilities!" Flynn was saying lightheartedly, though Rapunzel looked a bit far-off and concerned. Meanwhile, one of the dark shadows began to move, uttering a gruff, 'Let's go!' I recognized him instantaneously as one of the wanted twin brothers with the name of Stabbington. His ugly sibling was with him, along with the woman standing before me now, who held him back, saying, "Patience, boys. All good things to those…who wait."

My royal instinct kicked in. Was someone of palace-residing background about to be attacked by some mere scum? Not on my watch, you don't.

Now, I, as a crime-fighting horse, have a good bag of tricks up my sleeve. But this one is my favorite, best used at nightfall. If you have ever had a horse's thick breath on you unexpectedly, when you cannot see them, the smell of hay and grain and general horsie-ness (with just a dash of canine scent, but that is my own personal touch…go get your own!) reaches you, it will scare the heck out of you. Especially if you add a rather haunting snort and flare your magnificent nostrils. That is exactly what I did. Stifling screams, as my not-so-minty-fresh breath filled their noses, the threesome hightailed it out of there. I followed them for a few miles until I was sure they weren't coming back. By the time I retraced my steps back to Flynn and Rapunzel's campsite-ish-thingy, it was already dawn and I was looking rather unattractive. Simply put, sweaty. Heh, I had just protected him and his girl! All he could say was, 'Well I hope you're here to apologize.' The comment, brimming with sarcasm, was part of the reason my face looked a bit unattractive. Don't think too hard about it, I'm usually more handsome than such.

Ha, guess I scared off those redheads, but the_ woman_ obviously wasn't too phased. Royalty threatened? No sir, not on my watch.

Now, this woman had not seen me last night, but I HAD seen her, so I had the advantage in the current situation. She narrowed her eyes, giving me only a half glance and crept closer to their hideout. If she would have paid more attention, she would have noticed I was the 'palace horse without a rider' from the morning before. I snorted under my breath and glared at her silently. Was I really not that recognizable? That was when I saw her blade. A small, yet very sharp, as I could tell by the looks, blade, poised and ready to strike. HOLY SMOKES! She's going for Flynn! Excuse me, EUGENE.

I knew in that moment that anything I had ever known before did not matter. Canine instinct was banished. Eugene belongs with Rapunzel to some degree, at least, and am I going to stand back and watch him get killed? Despite his years of thieving, regardless of my desperate tries to ignore it, Flynn Rider isn't Flynn Rider quite so much anymore. He's turning into Eugene Fitzherbert. He should not die, just when justice is beginning to dawn on him. He deserves a chance to change. Death might have been proper a few days ago, but now? No. It's not time for his life to end. It is just beginning.

The woman was still about twenty feet from her destination, but thanks to my powerful instinct and smarts, (not to brag, of course) I just _knew_ she was going for Eugene's kill. I lunged into a gallop, off like a shot, for one, two, three strides until I was in front of her, skidding to a stop and swerving to cut her off. She stopped short, startled, no doubt. I gave her my best growl.

"You are that palace horse…" she murmured, FINALLY taking the time to observe me. "…without a rider." Her eyes widened. "RIDER…" she growled under her breath, but this time it was used as a proper noun. "FLYNN RIDER. You're conspiring with him, aren't you? Yet you are a palace horse, don't hide him from the law! Get that wanted ruffian that stole my daughter hanged! Tortured! Killed!" I cringed at the statements. No, Eugene did not and would never Rapunzel herself. The only thing he stole was her heart. Advantages to being a thief, I suppose. The woman continued, "What are you doing slowing me down?" I chose not to answer. Like I had much of a choice anyway. I growled once more. The woman sighed. "Well, some screwy pony isn't going to keep me from doing this…"

SCREWY. PONY. Is that what she thinks of me? She starts to move around me, creeping closer toward Eugene and Rapunzel, who have still not yet spotted her-or me. No! She is NOT going to kill him now. I ran once more, swerved a different way so instead of facing her so she could she my beautiful mane, dead in front of her, face to face.

Ears flat against my head, I knew what I must do. Slowly, I raised my hoof until it was level with her blade. With a mighty thrust, I shoved it out of her hand. It went flying into the air…STRAIGHT TOWARD EUGENE! Oh, no, no, no, no…I only made it worse. He was talking happily to Rapunzel, happily as in he was wearing his goofy grin once more, as they headed towards the boats in the evening dusk. He offered her his arm, extending his elbow slightly in the gentlemanly gesture. Rapunzel gave him a slightly baffled look. He smiled and explained the action to her, after which she gave him a shy, yet pleased look and took his arm as he continued talking and leading her toward the docks. The blade flew closer.

Oh, how I hated to ruin their sweet moment. I rushed right up to them, hearing Eugene exclaim "Max!" with surprise. Rapunzel widened her eyes and gripped his arm tighter. Judging it carefully, I took flight. For a fleeing moment it looked as if I would not catch it, and the world felt like it was moving in slow motion. The next thing I knew, cold metal was in my mouth. The handle of the blade.

Relief shot up through me like shock. I landed behind Eugene and Rapunzel quickly pivoting to face them, grinning then realized how…well…_screwy _I must look, with a lopsided smile and a elongated knife sticking out of my mouth.

Thankfully, Eugene and Rapunzel were not phased, just confused. I sighed. This would just have to forever perplex them. Rather that then know the truth. Eugene breathed, "Max…thank you…"

Eugene's POV

_I don't know what the HECK Max just saved us from, but he caught a knife…that was headed straight for us. Swallow your foolish pride, Eugene. He just saved your life. Thank him._

I smiled, and quickly darted my eyes to that woman, who had ducked behind a corner, but my keen senses saw right through her cheap hideout. Anger rose in me suddenly. Who was she, trying to kill Eugene? With a slight bow of courtesy to the royal, I took off, a screwy pony on a mission to protect.

~FIN~

Epilogue

I chased the cloaked woman through a tortuous twist of alleys and dark streets, set on my destination. She once got the nerve to ask where I led her, but I only growled and smiled to myself.

She was running full speed, trying to lose my chase and not paying attention to the object in front of her.

*SPLASH* *GURGLE* *WHOOSH*

Over the surface of the Corona's enormous fountain her drowned face appeared, mumbling something that I made out as:

"M-m-mother kn-knowwwz beeeeeeztuh…"

Mother Knows Best? Heck no, I, do.

**Heehee…did y'all like? ;) I LOVE IT! Yeah, I know I wrote Max a bit sophisticated/snobby, but that's the impression he makes on me. And he might actually think he's a dog, but that's just not really how the story turned out…**

**And, hey, MG had her knife ready when the Stabbington bros popped out instead…so I don't think it's too out there to say she very well could have been trying to kill him in a lot of parts, ya knows? ;)**

**I WOULD REALLY REALLY REALLY LOVE A REVIEW!3**

**And to everyone who asked me to continue this...thanks for talking me into it sorry it took soooooooo long! **

**More to come,**

**Latias**


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